The Earth Shook

Some Pro-Mods, that is, the truly insane drag racers, came out to Dunn Tire Raceway Park. In truth, they weren’t a true “Pro-Modifieds” class, but the class was open to, essentially, crazy cars competing for a $3000 prize.  After the second qualifying passes were completed, Nachmu the Younger took Tony aside to tell him that “they vibrate.”  They sure do. I was reminded of Psalm 18, which includes the following verses:

Can't see the craziness, can you? This car did the eighth-mile in 4.5 seconds.

Can you see the craziness now?

Then the earth reeled and rocked;
the foundations also of the mountains trembled
and quaked, because he was angry.
Smoke went up from his nostrils,
and devouring fire from his mouth;
glowing coals flamed forth from him.

God rides on the Wild Side, doesn't he?

These vehicles must be related to the chariots of fire.

I mean, Dunn Tire Raceway Park is known for a notorious quote by John Force, fearless Funny Car driver of many championships, who, in 1997, upon inspecting the drag strip at DTRP, turned to an official and said, “Where’s the other lane?”

The track has done nothing but deteriorate since then.

Believe it or not, the track that John Force feared has been conquered: a record was set by one of these insane dragsters, running down the strip with a competitor in the other “half” in 3.97 seconds at 163.5 mph.  Just so you know whom to avoid if you meet him in a dark alley, the guy’s name is Bob Frigon.

Lookit, any aficionado will tell you that 3.97 seconds is only respectably fast when it comes to pure speed on an eighth-mile track, but this is at Dunn Tire Raceway Park in Lancaster, NY.  It’s not set up for that kind of speed.

Chariots of the Divine

To be sure, at other tracks, one cannot stand literally two feet from the car as it thunders by, so DTRP offers a unique experience, something akin to standing next to God when he makes an appearance.  One feels fear and awe, nothing less.  It’s a divine experience to feel the heat of the exhaust, hear the pounding of engine-compression, and have your heart stop for a moment because the ground is falling out from beneath your feet.

It’s comforting to know that God is angry at my enemies.

Drag Racing at Dunn Tire Raceway Park in Lancaster

One of the Pro Mod competitors finishes a spectacular burnout.

Drag racing is a completely different beast from stock car racing. I would not consider myself a novitiate any longer, but I am still quite new to the experience of drag racing.  The Niagara Frontier has three good places for drag racing, and Nachmu HQ is nearest to the eighth-mile track at glorious Dunn Tire Raceway Park.

DTRP has its history, and, as is true with almost everything in the Buffalo region, its history is an albatross.  As is true with almost everything in the Buffalo region, however, the people make the ruins of a once-great facility into a near-great facility.  Thus the local drag racing scene. Continue reading

Annoyed By Anarchy

Or: Soaps for Generation X

It’s time for us to face the music: we have our soap operas, our evening dramas, and we’ve hidden behind anarchy.  We want to see our sordid stories, extrapolating some sort of meaningfulness from television serials into our own boredom, except with cool tattoos, seedy New Jersey streets, martinis in Manhattan, guns, and sex.  Lots of sex.

Nachmu has just gotten around to Sons of Anarchy, and I’m captivated by the characters and plot.  Echoing in my head, though, when the growl of the acoustic guitar over the steady bass line brings in the first stanza of the theme song, “Ride into this world,” is the clarion call of my own childhood, of Dad throwing us all out of the living room when that trumpet began to sound.  That’s right, “Ride into this world” makes me hear the theme for Dallas.  “Dad is watching his stories; don’t bother him.”

Some people have tried to write about the deeper meanings and significances of The Sopranos, Mad Men, Breaking Bad, Rescue Me, Sons of Anarchy, and what is surely to become a host of facsimiles, duplicates, and imitations, but there isn’t any deeper meaning.  It’s just not there, and cultural commentators writing about these shows are like miners mining for gold where only pyrite can be found.

Indeed, dear Nachmu, why the sanctimony?  Why the lecture? Continue reading

Start Your Engines

Saturday Night at the Races

Saturday nights are glorious in the Niagara Frontier: during the winter, there’s Hockey Night in Canada; during the summer, there’s asphalt circle-track stock car racing (dirt track racing is on Friday nights, but I’m at the drag races then). Racing night is a special taste of paradise, in my estimation.

We're still under the great wide open...

Walking through the gates at any decent local race track leaves me with a certain sense of awe.  It is a sublime thing that we have accomplished, capturing a wide open space within a fence, filling it with bleachers and pit-boxes, a tech barn, and all sorts of food and drink.  Smells of elements which do not belong together create an environment in the mind, too, which cannot be recreated anywhere else except at the race track: burnt rubber (old and new), nacho cheese, beer, racing fuel, body sweat, old wood, mown grass (from the parking lot), perfume, and fried food.  It wafts like the nose of a fine scotch, the several creating a greater one, a single malt of Saturday Night at the Races.

All sorts are necessary to have stock car racing.

When I first made my foray through the gates into that realm, I was surprised at the variety of nations and peoples within it.  I realized instantly that it was an advertiser’s dream, but even beyond the immediate business opportunity, I realized that this realm was for everyone; everyone could experience pleasure within these gates. It was almost cliché: fat people, skinny people, old people, young people, rich people, middle-class people, poor white trash, well-to-do, you name it.  I was most surprised to see entire families like mine there, a professional-looking husband and wife with a few kids, taking in the evening.  Indeed, I would say that at least the simple majority of fans were made up of small business owners, or those who worked in small-business, entrepreneur-types.

This is generally the wrong way to win a race.

These are the family and friends of drivers and owners of the cars on the track.  These are people of an understated joie de vivre. These are the people who make their own lives within a framework of ambition and freedom.  When you see a car racing, which, in stock car racing, is strictly regulated for the sake of competition–nevertheless, you are seeing freedom as it is meant to be: absolute within moral limitations.  At those speeds, it is impossible to keep the moral component pure; at that point, a driver is penalized, perhaps later confronted, but most assuredly received back into the realm as a friend and a family member.  Naturally, the most recalcitrant cheaters are sent away to race elsewhere, but their reputation follows them, and I can’t imagine that they are ever happily received.  Thus, stock car racing is a wonderful projection, a spinning model of the lives of free people.  How difficult it is, and how fun, to complete a few circuits around a half-mile track!

I sponsor the 74 car, sitting on the pole.

The rewards for good driving and good mechanics are, essentially, great rejoicing, even among the fiercest competitors: it’s tough to win a race.  A few bucks, maybe, are handed out, very few, if the owner is a skinflint know-nothing, but he can only do so much harm; the racing is the thing.  Even so, everything is re-set for the next race, a kind of Jubilee Re-draw for the Pole Position, and the competitors are rounding from the start to the finish, friends no more, but family altogether always.

Behind Turn Two

The racing at Dunn Tire Raceway Park is good.  It could be better; it could be much worse.  Some nights the racing is thrilling; other nights, merely entertaining.  The party in the pits, however, is always an event, which demonstrates the character of the realm within the gates.  Though the world will end, stock car racing will continue.

The MRI

Nachmu’s shoulder is hurt, very hurt, like the kind of hurt that keeps me from playing ball with the Nachmu Boys, keeps me from reaching for my beer (which I need to fetch right now, by the way; brb) in its traditional location (I am LCMS Lutheran, after all), and keeps me from sleeping at night.  And during the day.  I hurt it over time, I think, abusing my body with stress and lack of care, and finally broke something this February jerking some heavy planks of teak in the back of the Nachmu pickup truck. Usually after I abuse my body, it heals.  This time it did not.  So I complained to my doctor.

He sent me to an orthopedic surgeon, who, upon examining my shoulder, declared that I had probably torn my rotator cuff, or something to that effect.  Since that was his suspicion, he ordered me to have an MRI.  He had just indelicately wrenched my shoulder into all sorts of evil angles so that I was listening to him as a master, and I obeyed. Continue reading

Niagara County Fair 2011

As is our tradition, the Nachmu family headed out from Nachmu HQ late on Friday afternoon to enjoy a fairly good county fair.  It’s comparable to the unbeatable Illinois State Fair, which I attended for many years, even though I was a resident of central Illinois for 2 and one-half years.  Comparable, I say, in delight, though not in scale.

4-H exhibits anchor the fair, especially on Friday evening, and the 4-H community is particularly strong here, especially in the agricultural emphases, but not at the expense of research and technological emphases.  The highlight of the entire agricultural year, for Nachmu at least, is the 4-H livestock auction, which has been the central feature of Friday evening for at least 20 years now.  The auction brings top-dollar to very worthy young people and to their program.  Every year, I go to bid on an animal, a lamb or a goat, but every year, the prices are far too high.  That’s a good thing, when one considers the program itself.

Here are some photos to enjoy; just click on the image to get the next one…

The Train
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Dwyers Pub Scotch Club August 2011

It was another fabulous meeting: my seventh in eight months. I’ve made many new friends, which has been the primary benefit of the club, and I’ve learned a great deal about scotch whisky (it’s pronounced “eye-lah”), which is the primary reason I joined the club.

In a forthcoming post I will recount my first meeting of January of 2011, but for the time being, I want you, the reader, to participate in my delightful scotch-induced euphoria. Aaaaaaaaaah…

And now, some restful dreams, thanks to my participation in…

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The iPhone

A PC man forever is Nachmu.  Windows 98SE was hack-a-licious, loads of fun for a poor, miserable grad student. Windows 7 is pure joy. BlackBerry was CrackBerry.  The BlackBerry got old, and RIM forgot to come back from holidays up North.  Finally, the trackball on my 2.4 year-old Tour petered out, and that was the last straw.  Sluggish OS I could tolerate, but hardware issues are intolerable.  So I went to the store to find…

…an Android.  It’s Google, which is PC-y, right?  But, no! An important app that I need for my business is not available on Android.  Indeed, it is available only for the BlackBerry, which is currently CrapBerry (oh! oh! Say all my CrackBerryHead friends, New Release! This Fall! I reply, It’s Broken Now!), and the iPhone.

Like the tractor beam of the Death iStar, the salesman guided me aboard Darth Jobs’ latest release, the iPhone 4.  It gleamed forebodingly.  Look! It turns around and around and upside down, and it has the power to destroy entire planets!  So Darth Jobs used his Sith iLord mind tricks to convince me to buy one.  When I told the salesman that I was sold on the iPhone, I thought I saw Darth Jobs smile upon me from the banner hung above the iDisplay.  I glanced up, and he quickly faded away into the Dark Side of the iForce.

I will never buy an iMac.  Never.  Honest. iSwear.

Staining Oak Pores

Nachmu started this project several years ago, in fact, before much chaos descended upon my gentle home.  In short, Nachmu and Mrs. Nachmu began to occupy one of the downstairs bedroom at Nachmu HQ, making it into the Master Bedroom, and I thought it would be a good idea to upgrade all the trim.  Well into the project, unfortunately, Mrs. Nachmu thought that it would be a good idea to turn the Master Bedroom into the Office.  And so she did.

We moved into another bedroom.

Mrs. Nachmu then decided to move Nachmu the Younger into the Office. And so she did.

We moved back upstairs, moved Nachmu the Elder into the other downstairs bedroom, and turned the dining room into the Office.  Thus it has been for many moons, now, so I feel safe resuming the project, even though it be for the benefit of Nachmu the Younger instead of for me and the Mrs.

Here they are, laid out.  Allow me to describe the process:

Baseboards

The baseboards planed and laid out for the initial phase of staining.

  1. Plane the boards well, as flat and true as possible.
  2. Wash them with lacquer.  The lacquer should be cut with lacquer thinner, about a 1:1 proportion.
  3. Apply a dark stain.
  4. Plane the boards so that the stain comes off the grain, but remains in the pores.

The idea is that the stain will seep into the pores, but the lacquer will prevent the stain from seeping to deeply into the grain.  Thus when you plane the top layer, the grain and the pores stand in sharp contrast.

I’ll post more pictures as the project comes to its completion.